Dissappearing Fibroids

Hello! I didn't croak! I'm alive!

Yaaaaaayyy!

Apparently, my surgergy wasn't worth the paper the doctor wrote on, and definitely not worth the blood tests, ECG, laundering costs for the hospital gown & sheets, time off work, or parking money, either!

We have a case of mysterious disappearance: seven fibroids that lost their way.

Allow me to explain. There I was, sent by my GP to hunt for the "slow leak" causing my anemia. They THOUGHT they found fibroids, big ones, and lots of them, at the first hospital. I was there, I saw the wormy-shaped things on the monitor, the technician said to me "I think we've found the leak", she took LOTS of pictures...

So I ended up at my gyno's office, ready to have him scrape me out. He took another ultrasound, and hubby and I both saw it - or rather, didn't see it - nothing. Nada. No fibroids.

We were full of questions. And yesterday was the surgery designed to find out, and take out. So apparently, he scraped a little bit off one side, and a little bit off the other side, no fibroids in evidence, fini.

So now I'm recovering, taking advantage of all the pity my friends, family and acquaintances can scrape up, feet up, as Hubby would say "in my favourite position". Wondering what the heck this all means!

Meanwhile, Stepkid was on the phone this morning with her friend, looking out our kitchen window, and saying "So like, there's the WORLD'S CUTEST little squirrels here! They're playing! They're rolling down the tree! Rolling. Ya! Oh, they're SO CUTE!"

So hubby, meanwhile, came up from behind her, looked out, and said "They're fornicating, dear. That's where little squirrels come from!"

"Eeeeeeeeewwwwww!"

Having a Fall

Aah, the exuberance of youth! The wild, giddy sense of freedom, limitless possibilities opening up in front of you, strong in body, blood surging effortlessly through the veins, the feeling that the world is ours for the taking.

I don't actually recall these emotions from my own youth... MY youth was spent hiding from the world, from my family. My youth was spent in fear. But I see in today's youth all these wonderful emotions, and especially the grand sense of entitlement!

Take Stepkid, for example. Last week, after she had left for high school, she called her dad to say she'd forgotten to bring in something important and that he had to bring it to the school for her.

A rugby ball.

A BALL.

Well, he didn't, fortunately! It's a BALL, for chrissake! The school will not falter for lack of one ball for one day.

Undaunted, Stepkid phoned her dad THIS morning. She'd left her French homework on the diningroom table. Dad very apologetically said, well, we're stuck in traffic, dear, and there's nothing I can do. I of course, offered my two cents - "If ya'd a packed yer bag last night LIKE I TOLD YOU, you wouldn't have forgotten it!"

Even Stepkid's BEST FRIEND said to her this morning, and I quote: "Geez - if you'd clean up your room, you might be able to find your stuff, and then you wouldn't be late all the time!" I said nothing aloud, but thanked all the gods for her comment!

We don't help our kids when we clean up for them, race around finding things for them in the morning, drive them when they're late, or schlep things over to the school that they have forgotten. If we do these things for them, we're teaching them that they don't have to stand on their own two feet, that no matter how lazy they are, how late they stay up, or how disorganized they become, they will never have to face consequences.

If Stepkid gets a detention because she forgot her homework, that's a GOOD thing.

If her pal refuses to wait around and be late every morning, that's a GOOD thing.

Because one day there will be nobody around to pick her up, drive her here, follow her around, and fix her life. She has to learn how to fix her life now, while she's still got parents, so that when she does leave the nest she'll be ready to take care of herself.

We won't be here forever.

I fell down last night, when getting off the bus. I felt the world slip away from me, saw a woman's HUGE bum heading straight for my face, collided with at least three people, cracked my knees, wrist, and neck on the pavement, and was absolutely powerless to stop. It must have been hilarious - I'd give anything to see a vid of my face-plant into that poor lady's backside...

However, I went into shock and cried for hours after coming home. It didn't help that my Kid is mad at me for an unsuccessful attempt to be funny, that Hubby was mad at me for something I said to a friend, that surgery is my lot the day after tomorrow, and that the knee is question has been giving me trouble for years. Man, did I bawl!

But it brought home to me yet once more how fragile I really am. How little really holds us to life.

My pals are going out with me tomorrow for a round of drinks or three. One of them said I was unnecessarily morbid, freaking her out about this general anaesthetic stuff.

But people DO die, every day, in STUPID operations. Not life-threatening. Anaesthesia is dangerous. We do not live in Star Trek! Sometimes people die from going under.

Sometimes, when you fall and hit your knee, it can't be made better.

Sometimes, when you leave your homework on the table, there is nobody to bring it to you.

Sometimes, when you try to be funny, you end up hurting someone's feelings.

I've reached the age where I don't fall down anymore. Instead, I "have a fall." So begins my descent into old age, which i HOPE will take FOREVER.

Nevertheless, there will be more falls in my future, and one of them will do me in for good. It's not an "if", it's a "when".

So let's get living, people! This IS all there is.

Miscellany

Ok - an update is in order. First - the satellite.

As you recall, hubby & his bro were last seen attaching the satellite dish to the cat's scratching post.

Well, I am pleased to report progress: the satellite dish is now....

(are you really ready for this?)

...nailed to the tree.

That's right, folks! The 2 genii have obtained perfect reception without cutting down the tree that was in their way!

Of course, the first time the dog went out, her leash got caught and managed to knock the dish just enough so there was no more signal....

Moving right along with the theme of television, we were watching an episode of "Smallville" the other day. Beautiful pastoral scenes tucked into the middle as usual, with cows grazing contentedly...

It made me wonder, does Clark Kent use his superpowers when milking? I mean, ya gotta wonder how that works, from the COW's point of view!

"F***g MOO! What the hell was THAT?"

And today's last topic, cats and colds.

My darlin' has been sick for a while - almost as long as I have been, come to think of it! (Yes, I've taken her to the vet.) But her poor tiny nose is so blocked - god, if I sounded like that, I'd go to the hospital! She can't sleep, because she can't breathe. When she falls asleep, what little air she was getting is shut off entirely, and she wakes up.

Anyway, in desperation today I looked up kitty cold-care on the net, and found out I could give her infant nose drops, which dutiful hubby is now out hunting for... Then I got the bright idea of making her catnip tea. Smells like mud stew to me, but it has caused quite the uproar here! It's not even cool enough to give to her yet!

However, soon I shall be taking her into the bathroom and running the shower on hot, to get steam into the air, and soon both she and I will be breathing easier.

And last, but not least, a bowlful of chicken broth seems to have perked up her spirits a bit.

The goddess be thanked - Chicken Soup!

By the pricking of my thumbs...

We've all had to go through it - waiting at a test centre for a blood test. Getting out in the frosty morning air, taking a number, waiting, waiting, waiting...

Back when I was severely depressed, I didn't mind this part of my life. I'd sit quietly for hours and never have one thought. However, now that I'm no longer so down, I get frustrated and bored more easily! And waiting with 140 other humans, none of who has had their morning coffee... Well, it's not my favourite thing to do!

And then there's the human factor. Like the well-dress businessman, who stood near a wall. Stood erect, not leaning, eyes focused a little up in the air. "I'm a respected businessman. I'm thinking important things, right now. I'm not looking at anybody."

In fact, apparently NOBODY was looking at anybody! Everyone was trying hard to pretend they weren't there, being bored out of their skulls at waiting for a blood test....

Then there was the front door.

The front door of the CLSC is locked until 9 am. Or supposed to be. There's a sign, very near the front door, telling people to go to the REAR door if the front door is locked.

But the door is an all-glass sliding door. You have to walk away from the door to find the sign. That doesn't seem to happen much. Mostly what happens is, someone very nearly walks into the door, because they are expecting it to open. Then they look up and start waving their arms. Then they put their hands to the glass and peer in. They can see people inside, so they know that somehow these people gained entrance. So they step back and wave their arms again!

One intrepid fellow waved so long that someone got up, went to the door and pushed against the frame. The door ground open, inch by inch, and slammed back closed as soon as the goofball had entered.

Count to ten. Goofball is back, wanting out this time. What does he do? Well, first, he nearly slams into the door. Then he stands back, looks up, proceeds to wave his arms. When none of this works, he cautiously approaches the door frame and, first with one hand, then with two, proceeds to grind the door open, and escapes quickly before the door swishes shut on him.

This sequence is repeated ad nauseum. If I were sick, if I were near the breaking point, I would have started screaming at them. "Read the sign! Go to the back door, numbskulls! Hey! There's another door! This one doesn't unlock for TWO MORE HOURS! If you can't figure your way out of this, GO HOME - a blood test won't help! Trust me!"

Close to 9, the poor building guy comes in to work, and is grabbed by the elbow half a dozen times on his way to the janitor's closet. "The door's stuck." "No, monsieur, it's locked." "Well, people keep opening it and it makes an awful noise." "The door's stuck" "no madame, it's locked...."

OH MY GOD. Is this humanity at it's finest!

God save us all!

The Happy Happy Hubby

Yesterday we had a surprise birthday party for my hubby.

Well, it wasn't THAT much of a party. His brother & sister-in-law, my daughter... Stepkid had a REAL birthday party to go to, so she'll just turn up on Daddy's real birthday, which is Wednesday.

Poor hubby looked SO SAD, walking home from the bus, in the snow... He smiled wearily to see daughter, was happy to sit and await the arrival of the other guests...

And they came, and we ate, and everybody like it, and then we did the cake, and then one more pal turned up, yada yada yada...

Then he opened his presents. From me, since my budget was a grand total twenty ducks, he got a bottle of Dubonnet and a helium-filled balloon.

From Dear Daughter, he got a magnificent gift card to a favourite store, the one that carries Canada's OTHER currency....

And then he opened the gift from his brother...

And you should have seen the years fall from his face. His eyes sparkled! His dimples reappeared! He came back to life!

Wise brother had brought him a satellite dish and all the trimmings. Oh sure, it was secondhand, but hubby didn't care!
After dinner, when both "boys" would normally have fallen asleep in their respective chairs while sister-in-law and I chatted, they were UP, they were AT IT.

These are grown men, I want to stress. Hubby's birthday this year was "double nickels" - 55. And Bro isn't that far behind.

They are both managers of I.T. departments. They are both tops in their field, respected, sought after. Rooms go quiet when they are asked their opinions.

However, last night they attached a satellite dish to my cat's scratching post.

And saw nothing whatever funny about this, I might add, despite the fact that all three of us women who were watching them did so shaking our heads in quiet dismay...

Well, no channel was found that night, and I gave up around midnight. Hubby came to bed at 4 am.

Happy as a clam.