404 - Pie Not Found

So, Son-In-Law has been staying with us.

We are thrilled, actually. We could only have been more thrilled had my Daughter also been able to come. However, she had other commitments, appearing at film festivals and being interviewed because of her film "Crazy Love," which was about domestic violence. She got interviewed - did I mention that? - by a women's org. Because her film was that good! But I digress.

Last time Son-In-Law stayed with us, I took to calling him the Boy Wonder, because I had to Wonder what the Boy had done with all my stuff, since he took it upon himself to (helpfully?) re-organize my kitchen, bathroom, and basement whenever he wasn't busy. And since he's about 30 years younger than me and at the height of his powers, he can run circles around me, so it was like that Star Trek episode "Blink of an Eye," where he was accelerated to superhuman speed while I was left wondering what the heck was going on, hearing an insect-like whine in the air every time he passed through the room...

This visit has gone much smoother, though it hasn't been without bumps entirely. There was that fateful day when the Boy Wonder came home, expecting his sugar pie to have waited patiently on the counter for his return, and he found it gone, vanished, eaten by the two resident piggy-wigs. And, not two days later, I'd used up the last of his spinach. 404 - spinach not found.

All in all, I fear I am greatly in Boy Wonder's debt this visit! He's been great. Oh sure, he has his personal preferences - for instance, he insists that I use a small container, a travel container in fact, of lens cleaner spray, in the bathroom. I had finally finished the small container he had set up from his last visit and was, with great relief, using the large bottle again at last, and came home one day only to discover that he had once again refilled the travel bottle and hidden the large bottle. Sigh. He just wants me to use the little bottle. I just want to save the little bottles for when I travel, and use the big bottles at home. 

Tonight while Boyfriend and I were out, Boy Wonder texted me about the beets I had roasted yesterday, asking if he could have one. Yes of course, have all you want. Then he texted back, did I know I had left the stems on? Yes. And he informed me that he thought beets were easier to peel after being cooked if one removed the stems before cooking.

Sigh. 404-Mother-In-Law's-Patience-Not-Found.

How exactly DOES one explain to a young man in his prime that I have made it through 59 years without his help? That, to this point, I have successfully navigated crossing the street without getting flattened by a bus? That the treasures he found in the basement the other day are there because we don't use them, not because we didn't know we had them? That I actually know how to cook, I'm just sick of doing it. 

To a young man in his prime, I'm a mystery for sure! Dear god, I'm sure he'll be glad to be back with his own parents next week and his wife the week after that! And he won't believe me, but Boyfriend and I will miss him TERRIBLY! Such a vivacious soul! And so determinedly cheerful! Such energy!

For a few weeks, he brought the sunlight back into our lives and shook us up and tried to convert us into ... something or other! I hope we didn't discourage him too badly.

After all, he's young - he needs to dream!