Having a Fall

Aah, the exuberance of youth! The wild, giddy sense of freedom, limitless possibilities opening up in front of you, strong in body, blood surging effortlessly through the veins, the feeling that the world is ours for the taking.

I don't actually recall these emotions from my own youth... MY youth was spent hiding from the world, from my family. My youth was spent in fear. But I see in today's youth all these wonderful emotions, and especially the grand sense of entitlement!

Take Stepkid, for example. Last week, after she had left for high school, she called her dad to say she'd forgotten to bring in something important and that he had to bring it to the school for her.

A rugby ball.

A BALL.

Well, he didn't, fortunately! It's a BALL, for chrissake! The school will not falter for lack of one ball for one day.

Undaunted, Stepkid phoned her dad THIS morning. She'd left her French homework on the diningroom table. Dad very apologetically said, well, we're stuck in traffic, dear, and there's nothing I can do. I of course, offered my two cents - "If ya'd a packed yer bag last night LIKE I TOLD YOU, you wouldn't have forgotten it!"

Even Stepkid's BEST FRIEND said to her this morning, and I quote: "Geez - if you'd clean up your room, you might be able to find your stuff, and then you wouldn't be late all the time!" I said nothing aloud, but thanked all the gods for her comment!

We don't help our kids when we clean up for them, race around finding things for them in the morning, drive them when they're late, or schlep things over to the school that they have forgotten. If we do these things for them, we're teaching them that they don't have to stand on their own two feet, that no matter how lazy they are, how late they stay up, or how disorganized they become, they will never have to face consequences.

If Stepkid gets a detention because she forgot her homework, that's a GOOD thing.

If her pal refuses to wait around and be late every morning, that's a GOOD thing.

Because one day there will be nobody around to pick her up, drive her here, follow her around, and fix her life. She has to learn how to fix her life now, while she's still got parents, so that when she does leave the nest she'll be ready to take care of herself.

We won't be here forever.

I fell down last night, when getting off the bus. I felt the world slip away from me, saw a woman's HUGE bum heading straight for my face, collided with at least three people, cracked my knees, wrist, and neck on the pavement, and was absolutely powerless to stop. It must have been hilarious - I'd give anything to see a vid of my face-plant into that poor lady's backside...

However, I went into shock and cried for hours after coming home. It didn't help that my Kid is mad at me for an unsuccessful attempt to be funny, that Hubby was mad at me for something I said to a friend, that surgery is my lot the day after tomorrow, and that the knee is question has been giving me trouble for years. Man, did I bawl!

But it brought home to me yet once more how fragile I really am. How little really holds us to life.

My pals are going out with me tomorrow for a round of drinks or three. One of them said I was unnecessarily morbid, freaking her out about this general anaesthetic stuff.

But people DO die, every day, in STUPID operations. Not life-threatening. Anaesthesia is dangerous. We do not live in Star Trek! Sometimes people die from going under.

Sometimes, when you fall and hit your knee, it can't be made better.

Sometimes, when you leave your homework on the table, there is nobody to bring it to you.

Sometimes, when you try to be funny, you end up hurting someone's feelings.

I've reached the age where I don't fall down anymore. Instead, I "have a fall." So begins my descent into old age, which i HOPE will take FOREVER.

Nevertheless, there will be more falls in my future, and one of them will do me in for good. It's not an "if", it's a "when".

So let's get living, people! This IS all there is.